I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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