Non-Jews are for practice
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
