so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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