she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Randomize
