let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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