so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
