I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
