imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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