the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Randomize
