Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
