I faked an abortion last night.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
