i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
