bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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