So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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