i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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