I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
50% drunk capacity currently
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
