Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
