Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
