He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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