I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
