Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
