You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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