windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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