we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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