Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
