he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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