The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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