Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
