The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
