What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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