OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
