Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
