Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
