she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
