id be glad to
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
