Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
