I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
