The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
