I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
