I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
