he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
