Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
