Whatcha textin bout Willis?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
