yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
