went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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