She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize