I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
