She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
