Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
