the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
